Her Dark Half Read online

  Finished with his story, Max turned his attention to his sandwiches again, slowly eating the rest of them. Even though she didn’t feel like it, Lana ate, too.

  “Thank you for telling me all that,” she said when she was done. “I know it wasn’t easy, but I think I understand now why you did what you did today.”

  He snorted. “For all the good it did. I only ended up making it worse for those kids the same way I made it worse for Sarah.”

  “None of this is your fault.” She reached across the table to take his hand. “Back then, you were a kid taking on an adult with a gun. Now, you’re a cop following the law the best way you can. You couldn’t have done anything different in either case. You know that, right?”

  He shrugged. “In my head, I know that. But sometimes, late at night, when I think about my sister, I wonder if things would have turned out differently if I hadn’t fought back, hadn’t punched my dad. What if I turned and shielded my sister’s body with mine instead of trying to get the gun away from him? Even today, I wonder if things would have turned out better if I’d slowed down long enough to think about bringing some backup, or maybe looked in a window before shoving open that door. Maybe I would have seen enough to get the man arrested.”

  She squeezed his hand. “Max, trust me when I tell you this. You can replay these situations in your head a hundred times, thinking about all the things you could have done differently. But all that’s going to do is twist your insides into knots and make you doubt every decision you’ve ever made. It won’t help anything, and it certainly won’t change the past.”

  Max regarded her thoughtfully. “Something tells me you’re speaking from personal experience.”

  “Yeah, I guess I am,” she admitted. “Like you, it’s not something I talk about very much.”

  “I get that.” He nodded. “I’m not pushing, but if you want to talk about it, I’m all ears.”

  For the first time in her life, she actually did feel like talking to someone about it. Maybe because something told her Max would be able to understand more than most other people.

  “You know, I think I would,” she said. “If you can tell me your deepest, darkest secrets, there’s no reason I can’t do the same.”

  He glanced down at their empty plates. “You want to get a refill on our drinks and move this conversation into the living room?”

  They cleared the table, then grabbed two diet Cokes and took a seat on the couch. She kicked off her shoes and tucked her feet under her, sipping her soda slowly as she considered where to start her story. She hadn’t talked to a soul about this stuff since she was a teenager, and even then, most of the conversations had been with a therapist who’d been helping her put everything behind her.

  Finally, she took a cue from Max and decided the best way to do this was to jump in headfirst.

  “When I was sixteen, I was in a bad car wreck with two of my best friends from high school, Shari and Viola,” she said quietly. “They didn’t make it, and I barely survived. For years, I blamed myself for their deaths.”

  “I’m sorry about your friends,” Max said. “But how could you blame yourself for what happened? You weren’t driving, were you?”

  She shook her head. “No, I wasn’t driving. Shari was. I blamed myself for the accident because it was my fault we were out on the road that night.”

  “What do you mean?” he asked, lifting his arm to rest it on the back of the couch.

  Lana scooted closer, resting her head on his chest as she remembered how that night had changed her life.

  “It was rainy and foggy, which made it hard to see,” she explained. “We were at the movies and only realized how bad the weather had gotten when we came out. We should have headed straight home, but we’d planned to get something to eat after the movie and were too young and stubborn to change our minds. We passed half a dozen places we could have stopped at to grab a quick bite, but I really wanted to go to this drive-in because they had the best tater tots in the world. I should have realized Shari wasn’t comfortable driving in bad weather, but I was so busy daydreaming about those stupid tater tots that I didn’t slow down to think about how stupid we were being.”

  “What happened?” Max asked softly.

  Tears welled in her as she thought about those last seconds before the wreck. The music playing on the radio, Shari and Viola singing along in the front seat, her laughing like crazy in the back. Then suddenly, there were headlights coming right at them, and Viola was screaming.

  She hadn’t thought about the accident itself in a long time, and reliving the moment had her heart racing. Strangely, it also made her gums and fingertips tingle like they had today during her encounter with the cop from Central.

  She pushed those thoughts aside and instead forced herself to get the words out that needed to be said—before she chickened out completely.

  “We were on Highway 12 when another car veered into our lane.” She closed her eyes and listened to Max’s steady heartbeat under her ear. “I found out much later that the guy driving had been drinking, but in that moment, everything was a blur. One second, we were all laughing, and the next, all I could hear were the sounds of crushing metal and breaking glass.”

  She took a deep breath and fought down the tears. “We all survived to make it to the hospital, but Shari and Viola didn’t live through the night. I was in a coma and no one expected me to make it, either. Mom and Dad said the doctors were amazing, never giving up on me through one procedure after another. But while they thought I might live, none of them expected I’d regain full use of my body and mental capacity.”

  “How long were you in a coma?” Max asked.

  “Over a week,” she said. “The doctors had intended to leave me under for longer, but I came out of it on my own.”

  “How long did you stay in the hospital after that?” Max asked.

  “Only another day or two. Mom and Dad arranged for my doctor to take care of me at home. It probably cost a ton of money, but they’d been so freaked seeing me in the hospital that they got me out of there the first chance they could. I think even the doctors were stunned by how quickly I recovered. Some of them called it a miracle, but I think it was a matter of the right procedures at the right time.”

  “Is that why you went into the pharmacology side of organic chemistry?” he asked. “Because of what the doctors were able to do for you?”

  She nodded against his chest. “Uh-huh. They were working on the fly, giving me different drugs to help my body recover from the severe trauma I’d sustained. I wouldn’t be alive if it hadn’t been for that. But they didn’t have anything that could help Shari and Viola. That’s why I went the direction I did in college, in the hopes that maybe someday I could help create medicines that would allow patients like Shari and Viola to survive until their bodies can heal some of the damage, like mine did.”

  Max slipped his arm off the back of the couch, curving it around her. “You said you spent years blaming yourself for Shari and Viola’s deaths. What helped you get past it?”

  “Therapy mostly,” she said. “I was a complete mess for months after my parents brought me home. I didn’t even leave the house. Like you, I spent a lot of time wondering how things would have turned out if I’d done things differently—if I’d suggested we sit in the parking lot of the movie theater until the storm passed or told Shari to stop at the first restaurant we saw instead of insisting we go somewhere else. But after a lot of sessions with a really good psychologist, the raw edges finally dulled somewhat, and I was able to understand that playing what-if games would never change what happened. It would just keep me locked in the past.”

  “Sounds like that psychologist really helped you,” Max observed.

  “She did,” Lana agreed. “Maybe you should consider spending some time talking to one yourself. I’m sure the DPD has some on call that could help you.”<
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  Max chuckled. “I know this sounds incredibly guy-like, but I can’t see myself sitting down and talking about my feelings with a complete stranger. I’d rather talk to you.”

  She smiled as she leaned there against his powerful chest. “Anytime you want to talk, I’m here to listen.”

  “Might be a bit tough to have deep, meaningful conversations if you end up taking a job in France,” he pointed out.

  She absently ran a finger up and down T-shirt-covered abs. “I think I’m going to be sticking much closer to home than I originally thought.”

  “Oh really? What changed your mind?”

  Lana laughed softly as she pushed away from Max’s chest to look at him. “I think you already know.”

  Max dipped his head to give her a quick, teasing kiss. “I guess I do. In fact, I’ve felt this thing building between us from the moment we met. I just wasn’t sure you felt the same thing.”

  Lana traced a finger along his jawline, loving the scruff there. “Of course I’ve felt it. Are you that oblivious?”

  He shrugged. “Well, yeah, I’m a guy. Being oblivious is what we’re best at.”

  She laughed. “Well, Mr. Oblivious, I’ll spell it out for you. Yes, I realize there’s something special happening between us. We’ve just met and I already find myself trusting you more than anyone I’ve ever known.”

  He regarded her thoughtfully. “Kind of crazy, isn’t it? How fast this is happening, I mean.”

  “Maybe,” she agreed. “But when it’s right, it’s right. Mom was telling me today that she and Dad fell for each other fast, too, so maybe it runs in my family or something. Whatever the reason, I find myself wanting to spend every waking hour with you, losing myself in your arms and kissing you. I’m smart enough to recognize that feelings like this don’t come around very often, and I’d be crazy to walk away from them just for a job. I can work anywhere.”

  Max tugged her closer, dragging her up until she was straddling his lap. Having her knees on either side of his hips, the crotch of her jeans pressing down on that most wonderful part of his body, seemed like the perfect place to be.

  “Losing yourself in my arms?” he asked in a husky voice. “I like the sound of that.”

  Leaning in, he kissed her again, more slowly this time, his tongue slipping between her lips to tease hers. She wiggled a little higher on his hips, sighing against his mouth as she felt his cock slowly harden in his jeans. She rocked back and forth on his hard-on, loving both the way it felt and the fact that she could get him so aroused so quickly. When she finally pulled her mouth away, gasping for breath and almost dizzy from his intoxicating taste, his cock was hard as a rock, straining to get out.

  “I guess you’re not the only one who likes the sound of that,” she murmured. “Someone else down there seems to like it, too.”

  Max chuckled. “Yeah, he’s thrilled. I’m pretty happy myself—not just at how good it feels to have you sitting on my lap like this, either. Your offer to be there when I need someone to talk to means a lot.”

  “I’m glad. And I’m serious about that. I’m good at listening, and after spending so much time on my therapist’s couch, I picked up all the best lines.”

  His hands slipped down to her butt, resting there as she continued to gently move on his lap. “And what kinds of lines are you thinking about using on me?”

  She smiled as the bulge in his jeans found the absolutely perfect position, making heat pool between her legs.

  “Well, there’s my personal favorite,” she said as she gave him an extra grind. “How does that make you feel?”

  His hands squeezed her ass tighter, pulling her down even harder on his cock and making her clit tingle. “I think that’s obvious.”

  “Maybe,” she agreed. “But then there’s the big follow-up to that standard question: Where do you think that feeling is coming from?”

  He lifted a brow. “Your crotch grinding on my hard-on?”

  She shrugged. “Possibly. But I think you might be holding back on me. I think you should tell me how you really feel.”

  “I want to rip your clothes off and eat you up like a Snickers because I know you’ll be oh so satisfying?”

  “Hmm.” She had to work hard to keep a smile off her face as she placed one finger on her chin and gave him a serious look. “I think we might be onto something here. Let’s focus on the emotion you’re feeling right this second. Where do you see this all going?”

  “My bedroom?” he responded immediately, his hands moving up to the bottom of her tank top and sliding underneath to tease the sensitive skin of her sides with his fingers.

  “That certainly seems like a reasonable direction to go at this point,” she said, her body starting to tremble as his hands worked higher, shoving her shirt up. “But I think you might be staying too close to your comfort zone. Where else might you take this if you wanted to really stretch yourself?”

  “The kitchen table sounds good about now,” Max said.

  A low, rumbling sound almost like a growl coming from his throat, he yanked her shirt up and over her head. Lana had no choice but to lift her arms and let him, or he probably would have ripped her top off just like he’d suggested earlier. The sexy sound he’d made combined with the alpha-male way he pulled her shirt off and tossed it across the room was a serious turn-on. She couldn’t help but wonder where this was heading.

  Max leaned forward to kiss and nibble her bare neck and shoulder, and she shivered even more when she felt his sharp teeth nick her. She’d never been that kind of naughty before.

  “Oh yes, I think we’ve had a breakthrough. We should definitely keep moving down this path,” Lana murmured breathlessly.

  “That was kind of what I had in mind,” he muttered against her neck, not slowing down for a moment.

  Lana was so lost in the sensations of his lips and hands moving across her body she missed Max slipping her bra off until his warm mouth fastened on one of her nipples, making her moan out loud. Mmm, that felt so good. He went back and forth between each sensitive peak, cupping and squeezing her breasts in his big hands. She could have him do this to her all night.

  She hadn’t been with a lot of guys, but she’d been with enough to realize Max was getting her hotter than she’d ever been. She wasn’t even naked yet and her clit was tingling so much she thought she might orgasm from grinding on his lap. It had never been like that for her before, and she got the feeling it was only getting started.

  When Max pulled his mouth away from her nipples, stood up with her in his arms, and headed for the bedroom, Lana didn’t complain. She did, however, remember one very important detail.

  “Please tell me you have condoms,” she begged as she wrapped her arms and legs around him and held on tightly.

  He gave her a look but kept walking down the hall. “I’m hoping that isn’t something your psychologist said to you at some point?”

  She laughed. “No, that never came up in conversation. But it is a serious question. You do have protection, right? Not that there isn’t other stuff we could do, but…”

  “While I’m extremely interested in all that other stuff you mentioned, that’s not going to be necessary. I have protection,” he said softly, placing her gently on the bed. “But before we get to any of that, we need to get you naked.”

  Lana was more than ready to race Max to see who could get their clothes off first, but he didn’t give her a chance. One second, she was sitting on the edge of his bed; the next, her feet were in the air and he grabbed the bottom of her jeans and yanked. She quickly undid her belt and the top few buttons at her waist so he didn’t lift her right off the bed. The whole thing was so seriously sexy she swore a little growl escaped her throat. Max had her so hot she wasn’t even acting like herself. At this rate, who knew how wild she’d get?

  She watched as her jeans sailed across the
room to smack against a wall, leaving her lying on his bed in nothing but her panties. She would have reached down to wiggle them off, but a single look from him froze her. Something told her he’d want to take care of that little scrap of clothing himself. She lay back on her elbows, locking eyes with him as he moved toward her. He looked like a jungle predator, all muscular grace and barely contained hunger.

  She expected him to take his clothes off, too. It would only be fair. But as he caught her ankle in his hand and kissed his way along her leg, she realized he wasn’t worried about being fair right now. He seemed more interested in eating her up—like a Snickers.

  Yay for Snickers!

  Max’s warm mouth moved lower and lower, kissing and licking every inch of the way. In between the gentle, teasing kisses, he slipped in a little nip here and there. Why did she like that so much?

  When he reached her inner thighs, he slowed even more, nearly driving her insane as his mouth inched closer to her panty-covered pussy. She was so excited she was throbbing down there. She knew she was wet and wondered if the moisture was soaking all the way through the material. If so, Max would certainly be able to see it, since he was only inches away.

  He pushed her thighs wide, giving himself room to work. She was waiting for him to pull her underwear aside when she heard a tearing sound. She looked down just in time to see the remnants of her panties flying through the air. In the quick glimpse she had of them, it looked like they’d gone through a shredder.

  She was about to point out that little piece of material was more expensive than they looked. But she never got the words out because right then, Max’s mouth came down on her pussy.

  There wasn’t a whole lot of teasing buildup. He put his mouth on her and made quick, little circles with his tongue. The sensation was out of this world.

  She buried her fingers in his spiky hair, not because she wanted to hold him in position—it was obvious he wasn’t going anywhere—but so she’d have something to hold on to and wouldn’t float off into space.

  Her orgasm started as a featherlight tingle, but it came on fast after that, charging at her like a bull. She didn’t bother trying to get out of the way, but simply threw back her head and screamed.